It's time.
Today was just a normal day, apart from the really sucky internet connection. I can barely surf the net, let alone play some games(online games, i don't really play offline games). Screw whoever that's hogging the bandwidth(that's what you get for living with anime minded friends, they download 24/7. SAVE THE BANDWIDTH FOR ME TOO, ASS!). So being bored as i usually do, i went through some blogs, and randomly clicking on their profiles. Then i saw a birthdate, 1987, and she's 18. I got to a shock for a minute there. Holy cow,I can't believe that i'm turning 19 this year.
19!Ugh, i feel so old now. I don't think i look 19. I don't think i feel 19. I don't think i think 19. oh my gosh, 19.
I do stupid things. I play alot. I'm scared to go and pay the bills alone. I sing by myself infront of the computer. 19? nu-uh.
no it's not my birthday yet.
woha!
it's the ferrr-ick-ing holiday~!!!!!!!11one
what can i do during holidays? here's the list:
- pwn some noobs in dotA. I'm doing it as we speak. but even i get pwned sometimes. dang.
- play some guildwars(although i highly doubt it, it ain't fun playing less than 3people).
- do some 3D modelling(heh i like things that're easy).
- sleep.
- go out and take some nice photographs(hullo cute girls~ (i'm joking,ok?)).
- learn stuffs.
- dance stupidly at home.
hmmmm... suggestions anyone?
The 2 person I hate to see crying.
My dad, and my grandpa.
Both of them cried when my grandmother(Tok Mak) passed away on Saturday, 5:17am.
A couple of days before saturday, my mom called me asking whether I would want to go back and visit my grandmother at the hospital. I replied no, I was busy with assignments and exams. So she said ok, call her when I have some free time. I then continued with my assignments, thinking that it's nothing spectacular, since my grandmother always gets sick.
Then on Friday, I was relaxing, a day after I didn't manage to consult my MDP final project with Che Mat. I thought I would want to continue with my canvas a little bit more before consultation, so I didn't call my mother for the visit.
The whole house was playing Warcraft on blue server, till morning as usual. Then while we were playing against some friends, around 4am, zul noticed that my phone was vibrating, as it was on silent mode, I forgot to turn it back on to normal mode. I thought it was some miscall or something. Then my sis rang the house phone. I picked it up and she said "Azhar ada?". I answered "yes?", and she said "Tok mak sakit, boleh balik tak sekarang?". I was shocked. It's 4am. To call someone at this time isn't normal, it must be something serious.
My dad came about 25 minutes later, I was still playing dota half-heartedly atm, but I left immediately and told zul that I need to go to my grandparents house. In the car, the radio was tuned to IKIM, some islamic channel instead of the usual
light and easy that my dad always listens to. It felt weird. My dad was silent all the way to my grandparents house in Puchong, 25 minutes away from Cyberjaya.
When I arrived, I saw everyone sitting around my grandmother. Some were reading the quran, some were talking to my grandmother, but all eyes were watery. Tok Mak looked really pale with swollen eyes and her mouth was gasping for air. She had difficulty to eat so there's a tube fixed through her nose for supplement milk.
About 20 minutes later, there was a little bit of supplement milk mixed with blood came out of Tok Mak's mouth, we all knew it was time. Tok Sein looked really sad. Uncles and Aunties were crying. Uncle Jack, who held Tok Mak's hand all the while, went somewhere right after. He came back with really red eyes.
My mom said that Tok Mak wanted to see all her child and grandchildren, I was the only one that she didn't get to see, days and weeks before, it was always the same reply from me, assignments. Her eyes closed after she saw me that morning. Mom said Tok Mak was like waiting for something, unable to close her eyes hours before. Mom said it was me, I was the only one she didn't see yet. Thank god I manage to come just in time, the one last time.
It's Tok Sein's job to inform others about the death of her wife. I can see that the task was a hard one. Tok Sein reached his old address book. He didn't have the energy to dial the numbers, so I volunteered to help. Everytime as he was informing about the death, he weeps.
I fell asleep soon after, about 6am. I was tired but so was everyone else. I guess I was selfish. Everyone else was working even before I came to the house. I hate myself.
I woke up about 9am. My father woke me up, saying that it was time to help out. I went and take a shower, a fast one, and head straight to where they were wrapping Tok Mak with kain kapan(no idea what it's called in english).
Then it was time to give last respect to Tok Mak before they fully wrap her up. My dad and Tok Sein was in tears, again. I couldn't stand seeing that and almost went into tears myself.
Tok Mak was safely buried just after 12 afternoon. This coming Raya will be mostly felt.
